Rakhi, ab kya reh gaya baaki?

You've got to hand it to her:

She never fails to come up with something to top her previous whatchamacallit. She was once some barely clothed item girl. Sometime later she started appearing in tiny forgettable roles in just-as-forgettable movies. Then the nation saw her hysterics on the popular reality show Big Boss (is there a bb or a gg somewhere in that?). This was the place where producers watching realised how much potential she had to bring up TV show ratings. This was where she declared her love for some wannabe model when someone else ridiculed her.

And then life was all cosy. And rosy. She and her beau appeared together in more reality TV shows, won some, lost some, but they were together and happy. The couple who made it from scratch. Together forever. She even had her own chat show!

Or not. Then the nation had to survive Mika's kissing hullabaloo and another news-channel-worthy Boyfriend-slapping episode. And she had to survive hearbreak.

Cut to today. Rakhi mourns the lack of love in her life. And then decides to do something about it.

And how! First, she cashes in on tradition. She not only commercialised the whole business of arranged marriages, making money out of the whole affair, but ends up becoming Princess Rakhi with her very own swayamwar!

In a nation where men and their families are still visiting potential brides to 'see' them, asking them to display their 'talents' and valuing them on how well they sing, cook or dance, or better, how much richer they could make them, she, the RAKHI SAWANT, makes the men dance and sing and woo her with love letters, while the nation watches. Some in shock, some out of curiosity of this whole new process, and the rest for the pure entertainment that comes out of watching people proclaim their love to Rakhi Sawant.

If you haven't seen the show, these are just some of the gems you missed ;)

1. Rakhi's ocassional pearls of wisdom (main apne pati ko humesha khush rakhoongi, kabhi bhi aisa nahi sochungi ki ab to mera ho gaya, ab kya karna),
2. Rakhi's laments (mujhe kisi ne nahi sikhaya ki pyaar kya hota hai, 'date' kya hota hai)
3. Ram Kapoor, in his unconvincing, if anything, role as Rakhi's friend and confidante.
4. her falling in love with some of her suitors (Manmohan ji ne to mera mann moh liya),
   
5. the attempt to show the simple girl Rakhi beneath the glamourous getup (oh the shock when she was offered a drink - Bacardi *beep*),
   
6. fluttering eyelids as she swoons to almost everyone saying a sweet word to her,
7. suitors ranging from the romantically poetic to the obnoxiously absurd
   

And...
COMING UP:

How much can you do for Rakhi?
Do you really love her?
Will you tattoo her name on your hands?? (Suspense music, shocked faces)
STAY TUNED ;)